Bogota

Bogota a la funicular 

Our flight to Bogota was delayed 4.5 hours, so it wasn't until 2:30am we arrived. Waiting for our luggage at baggage claim, we noticed a large group of people pressed against the glass wall. All of a sudden, an outburst of clapping and cheers drew our attention to a huge Colombian family - men, women, and children of all ages, more than a dozen people - holding signs welcoming one person. All I could think of was Gloria's Colombian relatives from Modern Family. 

Diego met us at the airport and together we whisked our way through Bogota's clogged highways and streets avoiding maniacal drivers and street performers literally performing in the street. (Take a note US panhandlers: learn to juggle or something entertaining - people will be more likely to give you something.) Thanks to Diego's aggressive driving we avoided rush hour and more importantly the daily monsoon. We parked next to his alma mater, the University of the Andes (most prestigious in Colombia) and walked downtown to lunch. A cool fountain runs down the length of the street. Locals tease that the homeless bathe in it. 

The Muisca Craft

Colombia is still believed to be the home of El Dorado (the airport for sure) and after visiting the Gold Museum, I can say it probably is. I have never seen so much gold in my life - masks, necklaces, ear rings, ornaments, plates, headgear, even a seashell covered in gold leaf - the shell itself disintegrated long ago but gold leaf kept the shape. These guys were so creative, hell, I wouldn't have been surprised to see gold toilet paper! It has been central to Colombian civilization for thousands of years. Metallurgists there pioneered many methods for utilizing and shaping objects by mixing different compounds to added durability. 

In my past life I was a model

The last exhibit we saw was a media presentation in a circular room made to reminisce an ancient alter or sacrificial chamber. It was dark. Flashes of lightning; claps of thunder rang out again and again. Pre-Colombian chanting filled the chamber as a blueish light surrounded us. Focal lights switched on and off, revealing a vast wall of gold plates and trinkets so spectacular I still am humbled by it's magnificence. 

We walked the short distance over to the Botero Art Museum, home to an extensive collection of Fernando Botero's fat people art. It was quite interesting to see, though admittedly would seem more appropriate in an American museum; perhaps it will go on tour in the future. A few paintings from other artists including Picasso contrasted nicely with the others. The building itself was very charming, a wonderful specimen of a large Spanish colonial mansion with a lovely courtyard garden. 

Statues at Botero Museum

However, dark ominous clouds hovered above us as we walked through the Candelaria district back to the car. Despite our best efforts the rain which thus far we had avoided so well started to pour, so we quickly popped into the Bogota Beer Company pub and kicked back delicious local brew. Once the rain let up enough for us to make a run for it, we drove through the posh district of Bogota and past the American school where Diego works. Traffic was a nightmare....we concluded its something about cities that beging with "B" -- Beijing, Bangkok, Bogota -- all have nightmarish traffic.  

Diego brought us to a local fruit market filled with different fruits and vegetables known only to Colombia. We filled a shopping cart with a handsome sampling to bring on our overnight trip the following day. The massive passion fruits brought an equally massive smile to my face...I bought half a dozen. Later I realized they were not sweet like the ones in Asia. 

Afterwards we dined at Carbon Express for a reasonably priced sampling of local meat dishes. The piece de resistance being deep-fried stuffed intestines....delicious! Overcome with elation, I made a quick call to Ms Pratt who had just sat down to her dinner in West Virginia. Upon hearing of our choice in cuisine, she promptly passed the phone to someone else. 

Colombian sushi

We returned to Bogota on Friday afternoon from Villa de Leyva, and enjoyed a much needed nap before heading out for dinner and to go to a club. We went to the area known as the "T", very similar to Sanlitun in Beijing filled with bars, cafes, restaurants, and clubs, as well as major shopping. Diego suggested we  try Colombian style sushi - I declare, I've never heard of such a thing! The verdict: totally AMAZING! Each piece came in a cone, some made of traditional seaweed, others of a corn tortilla. We ate a ton, and finished it off with some passion fruit ice cream atop a rice crispy cone. 

Stuffed to the point we nearly had to unbutton our trousers, dancing at El Mozo sounded a fantastic relief. But first we settled at a small gay bar that had games to play at your table. We chose Jenga. El Mozo quickly filled up after we arrived, the music alternating between house mix and a popular Colombian style that Alex and I couldn't quite get the hang of. Our night ended rather early due to exhaustion.

The Three Amigos

High above the city we visited the pilgrimage site of Monserrate. A funicular whisked us up the steep slopes providing breathtaking views over the city. The top is home to a 17th-century church that undoubtedly was a pain in the butt to build (imagine hauling the materials up there on foot). There wasn't much else to see or do, but the panoramic views alone made the trip well worth it. 

Aside from snapping a few photos, we had some good street food: a Colombian specialty of lungs and plantains. It was very tasty. We washed it down with tea made from coca leaves - that plant that produces cocaine. Though not flavorful on its own, adding to warm sugar water made it quite enjoyable.

Plaza Bolivar

Our next stop was Plaza Bolivar, the iconic central plaza in Bogota filled with pigeons, tourists, and hawkers, yet surrounded by magnificent architecture. A short stroll away was the Presidential Palace and Parliament building, neither of which we could really get close to. From there we proceeded to walk to the National Museum; a policeman informed us it was 10 blocks away, when in reality we walked closed to 30! The museum was quite small - we only needed 40 minutes to see everything. 

Colombians are obsessed with penises.
This one was a 'goblet'

Alex surprised me our final evening with tickets to the opera Orfeo at the National Library Theatre. We were only able to stay for the first act, and though there were no English subtitles, the show was quirky and fun. It wasn't until Orfeo entered the stage that things really took off. His voice BLEW US AWAY! It was so incredible the hairs on the back of my next stood up. Goosebumps crippled my body. The actor portraying Orfeo was an Argentinian named Nahuel Pennisi. It was his operatic debut. He even played guitar on stage. Incredibly, he does this even though he is blind. The three of us were so disappointed - almost in tears - that we couldn't stay for the whole thing. 

The next chapter of this trip involved a cancelled flight after everyone had boarded, calling Diego at 4:30am to get his address to return, and a scathing description of United Airlines which I shall refrain from repeating. However, I will say that I felt like the mummy on the right after dealing with United Airlines - a shrieking nightmare from lack of sleep and dead on the inside. The mummy is pre-Colombian, seen on display at the National Museum.

Bonus day in Bogota, I couldn't think of anything better to do than go to another restaurant featured by Anthony Bourdain. Which brings me to a side thought: if Rick Steves followers are known as "Rick Knicks," what are Bourdain devotees called? Tabula was worth every peso; the worst part was deciding what to order with our beef shank. I am pleased to say it was by far one of the best meals I have ever had. Finishing it off with Colombian truffle cake, I discovered a new exquisite combination: chocolate and lime. It sounds nasty but the lime creates a resounding flavor that enhances the chocolate. If you don't believe me, try it yourself. 

What do you see???

We strolled over to the small, and quite hidden Modern Art Museum. There were some interesting pieces, but nothing that stood out - certainly nothing to write home about, but I do enjoy seeing what local artists come up with. It took quite an effort to get past the Sunday market which filled the street and had vendors selling everything from cell phone covers to pure junk. We hopped in a cab to get home and rest, bidding our host and Colombia farewell and a gracious thank you. 

Walking through La Candelaria